If you want me to talk to you, don't shout my name, over and over when I am silent.
Don't shout in frustration. I don't want to talk to people who are shouting at me.
If you want me to talk to you, don't get frustrated and feel impatient.
Don't grab my arm and shake it.
If you want me to talk to you, don't say, "Say something!"
Don't say "Here we go again..."
If you want me to talk to you, don't say, "What's wrong with you?"
If you want me to talk to you, try to figure out what I am feeling if I am unable to speak.
Don't deny things I am telling you.
If you want me to talk to you, don't feel rejected when I am silent. Be patient.
If you want me to talk to you, reach out and put your hand on me. Show me that you are there, waiting patiently. Give me time to speak when I am ready.
If you want me to talk to you and I am crying, don't tell me to stop crying.
If you want me to talk to you, and I am able to tell you how I feel, don't give me a lecture about how "we all feel that way sometimes."
The reasons I feel the way I do are not the same reasons anyone else feels the way they do
If you want me to talk to you, don't invalidate me when I tell you how I am feeling.
If you want me to talk to you, don't act like you don't have much time to listen.
If you want me to talk to you, don't say, "I came here tonight to just listen to you and not give you advice, just like you told me, but you don't seem to want to talk." When you say this I feel blamed, disapproved of, lectured to.
If you want me to talk to you, don't say, "Why don't you..."
and if you really want me to talk to you, don't ask me what I am thinking. Don't ask me what I am doing. Ask me how I am feeling.
The original writting was based on somethings that someone named Carol in Peru did recently, someone else named Manuel in Peru, someone named Esmeralda in Ecuador and someone named Gretchen in the United States
